Journal of Moldova
September
1st 20XX
Dear
Diary,
This is
the last entry before the new school year! I’m so excited to finally be a fifth
grader, a member of the ruling class in World elementary school.
September
2nd 20XX
Dear
Diary,
The first
day of school was great! Class is always boring as usual, my new teacher seems to
be fun, and we finally get to play on the jungle gym instead of napping or waiting
for a turn on the swing. Today, the fifth graders went to the jungle gym as a
group and we sat there, making sure the younger kids understood that it was our
area, as it was for the previous year’s fifth graders. I bet we will have so
much fun!
September
23rd 20XX
Dear
Diary,
Class has
started to get routine, every day is almost the exact same thing. All day in
class, my mind wanders to what I will do in recess. By now, the younger kids
have stopped wandering near the jungle gym and we all have fun. However, something
weird happened today. Everyone in our year had bonded and knew each other, all 195
of us. Of all of those people, no one had ever at any point said that they were
better than the rest of us, until US shouted it out today. I told you about
Ulysses Sam right? He is a rather big guy, maybe a little lacking upstairs, but
he seemed rather nice until today. We call him US because Ulysses Sam is way too
long of a name. Anyway today, US suddenly climbed up to the highest point in
the jungle gym and sat there. Whenever someone tried to also get to the highest
point, US just pushed him or her off! At the end of recess, he shouted out to
everyone that he was the ruler of World and that we should listen to what he
says. Hah! Like that is ever going to happen! Well, I’m very tired.
September
24th 20XX
Dear
Diary,
That US
kid has become a little mean. He said that he would not bother the rest of us,
but he called out Chin and Russy, the A brothers. They’re brothers that are new
to the school, and their names are Chin A and Russy A. Anyway, they are both
pretty big people, but they are really nice about everything. Out of nowhere, US
called Chin and Russy out to behind the dumpster, where no one could see them.
We don’t know what happened, but when they all walked back out, they looked
like they had fought. US was bleeding a little from the lips and both Chin and
Russy were holding their sides. However, US was grinning, so I assume that he
won. I hope this doesn’t mean US starts to think he is better than all of us.
October 9th
20XX
Dear
Diary,
In
school, US has become the bully of World elementary. He tells us how to play on
the jungle gym, and whenever some of us start to get into an argument, he always
thinks he is involved and acts like a judge! Today, I got into an argument with
my friend, Grhyce, about who won the race around the jungle gym. Suddenly, US
appears out of nowhere and claims that Grhyce had won, telling me to back off.
Is he trying to police all of us? Because of this, people around the jungle gym
have started to whisper behind his back, saying that he is really dumb, and
only a big bully. I hope he goes away soon; it isn't fun playing on the jungle
gym with him on top of it.
November
10th 20XX
Dear
Diary,
Sorry I haven’t
written in a long time, I've been busy with tennis. Everything now is routine,
US tells us what to do and we follow what he says, even if we don’t like it,
because he is pretty scary after beating up Chin and Russy. I really hope he disappears.
December
17th 20XX
Dear
Diary,
YAY! God
has listened to me! Today US didn’t show up, and the teacher said that he will
be gone! Today it was all happy in the jungle gym, and everyone was playing
however they wanted. Grhyce and I made a snowman, and no one was there to tell
us how to do it! Life is great.
December
20th 20XX
Dear
Diary,
Everyone
is still really happy US is gone, but today Chin and Russy started to tell
people what to do, just like US did! And worse, people have started to join
sides, either supporting Chin or Russy. I don’t have a good feeling about this.
January 4th
20XX
Dear
Diary,
Today was
so exciting! The second day back from December break, Chin and Russy got into
an argument over who was taller, and they each called all of their friends to
their side, and it was getting really loud with everyone shouting at each
other. I was pretty sure everyone was going to fight, and I was scared. But
suddenly, we hear US’s voice from the top of the jungle gym, telling us all to
be quiet! Apparently he went on vacation early and just got back. Anyway everyone
calmed down after that, and Chin and Russy grumbled about it, but they walked
away. I told Mom about it at dinner, and she explained that even though no one might
like US, even though he might be dumber than us, even though he can be mean, he
is important to keeping peace in World elementary. I didn’t understand what she
was saying, but I guess I like having US around because no one else can do the job of bullying everyone to make sure people don't start fighting.
This was a really creative way of expressing your opinion about American exceptionalism. The diary entry format worked especially well because it allowed you to cover a longer period of time and show how exceptionalism developed. You succeeded in creating personifications that were simple enough to follow, but still proved your point that US wasn't really better than any of the other "kids". One thing you might consider adding is a reason why US thought that he was superior, in other words, if America is not really exceptional, what makes Americans think that it is?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNice job Panda! Creating a world where the countries of the world are represented as kids really brings the reader into the story to think about the exceptionalist doctrine of the US. The diary format was quite effective at communicating your viewpoint to the readers - it seemed like you actually experienced the events! You explained and connected the world of international relations and hegemony to the world of the jungle gym in a simple way that made readers understand how and why the US is necessary to peace. A point that you might want to expand on is the narrator's direct interaction with US before and after the argument. How was the narrator affected by US's actions before? What does US do the narrator specifically?
ReplyDeleteThis is by far the most creative narrative I've read yet, and it was thoroughly engaging. The clever names and journal format were both really helpful in showing the role of the US in the world and how it changed over time. The ending in particular, when your mom says that US is important although nobody likes him, was interesting because I think that's how many people view American exceptionalism today. Although many people may disagree about the greatness of America, like children; most people just accept what they hear and allow America to continue to do as it pleases. You were extremely successful in answering the question of American exceptionalism and through your writing, I was able to clearly see your stance on the question. The only suggestion I would make is to expand upon why US suddenly thought he was better than everyone else, and include some excerpts of speech from the characters to leave something up to the reader's interpretation, as the diary is solely based on what the recorder is perceiving.
ReplyDeleteLike the other people who commented, I commend you on the creativity of the narrative. While the simplistic nature of the child's diary entries and the playground setting makes the narrative very easy to understand and quite engaging, I feel like it also comes with some slight problems. You seem to oversimplify America's role in the world and don't quite explain all the power dynamics you're trying to portray to their full extent in this narrative. For example, I understand that the children are intimidated by the US after how he beat up Chin and Russy, but why do they all side with him rather than decide to gang-up against them? America has to at least have the illusion of being a benign world power to keep international credibility, not just appear a complete bully. So really my main piece of constructive criticism would be to explain the relationship of the US and the other children in more detail so we understand the power dynamic more and why nobody chooses to oppose pure tyranny. Also just out of curiosity, what does 20XX mean?
ReplyDelete20XX is an unspecified date in the 21st century
DeleteAlex: You idea is actually brilliant. Like Fiona, said your personification of the countries made is simple to follow, and explained your ideas clearly, "like I'm a five year old". Your description of the "ruling class" as countries is curious. It shows how even small countries like Moldova think they're exceptional in some way. If countries are 5th graders, what would be the kids below 5th grade? I'm also quite confused as to how you chose your dates. You could base it on real events in history. For example "December 20th 20XX" is probably the Sino-Soviet split and border wars which was March 1969. Your ending, where the mom tells how US keeps peace is quite interesting. Perhaps you can give a little history of how things came to be, and show why US thinks it's exceptional through its actions.
ReplyDeleteVery nice job portraying American exceptionalism in an imaginative way! Like the comments above, your visualizations of the role of America in global society through the actions of the bully US are engaging easy to follow. Although you make it clear that America upholds itself as a world power, it would have been nice if the story elaborated on the “why” and “how.” Why does only US get the privilege of climbing to the top of the jungle gym? How does US justify his actions? I understand it would be a bit difficult to portray those issues because you are the narrator, viewing US’s actions from an objective point of view; however, it would have given a more comprehensive look at this concept of “American exceptionalism.” Also, the other children do represent other countries, but is there a reason why reluctantly comply with US’s demands? Maybe the 5th grade tone generalized the ideas that I would have liked to see explored; it would have been nice if the narrator had depth and some insight in US as a person.
ReplyDelete